Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Back to the Inane!

As promised faithful readers (reader?) this post will have very little to do with my life, any other serious topics and will be pictureless. But I will cram it chock full of inane shit and funny links. Deal?

Great. Let's go.

First things first: It is almost three in the afternoon and I'm drinking coffee and eating peanut butter on toast. Is there something wrong with me?

This may be the funniest thing I've listened to in a long time. He is either the most absurd liar on the planet or has some of the best "right place/right time" luck I've ever heard...listen to it all. It's worth it.

After weeks of vacation and beer-drinking I have to go to work at the pub tonight. Please tell me I don't have to go?

What I'm Listening to: David Cross "It's Not Funny"

The man from Mr. Show and Arrested Development is one of America's funniest living comedians. Favourite quote of the day: "Was anyone here aborted?"

What I'm Watching: Switching between episodes of Little Britain (the funniest TV show on earth next to The Simpsons) and MPD Psycho (a bizarre and ultra-offensive Japanese detective show). It only lasted 6 episodes and I've now watched the first 4. How they are going to wrap up who Lucy Monostone is, the Barcoders, Amamiya and Nishizono's connection and the one-eyed snuff film director in two episodes is beyond me.

What I'm Reading: Just finished Charles Bukowski's Ham on Rye. A brilliant, depraved and hilarious semi-biographical story of Bukowski's alter ego Henry Chinaski. For around 25o pages I read this novel in about three hours. I blew through it. Highly recommended. Finished Richard Matheson's I am Legend yesterday which has to be the best vampire novel I've ever read. And I've read a lot of vampire novels. Thanks to Rick at Dark, But Shining for the recommendation. Yes Rick, I found the edition you told me to get and the short stories are great! Not sure if Dav has read it but he should. It is a great "Last Man" story of which he is a fan. Go tell Dav to read it.

Also...do yourself a favour and go and watch this. After watching this go to their main site and watch your way through the video archive. It had my sides splitting. This may be the very first postmodern prank video collection.

At Portia's prodding (okay...no prodding involved) I went to Googlism.com and figured out what the cross-referencing of my name brings up on Google. I have bolded the best ones. Behold:

Googlism for: des
des is alausi
des is ja da opa
des is no
des is no good
des is de webseite von badesalz
des is vulnerable
des is proven to be very secure? (I love the question mark)
des is here
des is jo auch geil
des is echt
des is a test
des is' der diddel (hehe...diddel)
des is die liebe kleine cora
des is insecure
des is ­ lm modells für eine offene
des is kampioen olé olé (Ole!)
des is god (was there ever any doubt?)
des is which?
des is ja der hammer
des is dem dennis seine homepage
des is frequenzwasser
des is a punter of loudonline
des is now a federal
des is irgendwia logisch
des is des (officially the name of my debut solo album)
des is liebe
des is moi hape =
des is dem koarl sei homepeitsch
des is mei 1
des is "history"
des is nur a professorische seitn
des is dead (the ironic name of my comeback album)
des is now a federal standard (and why did it take so damn long?)
des is dedicated to providing
des is schoa schön
des is
des is­lm­modells geldangebot
des is proven to be very secure? terry ritter
des is here it
des is a minor variation of this standard (only minor? I'm impressed)
des is not secure
des is ­ lm modells für eine offene volkswirtschaft i
des is the king of television presenters (this is my epitaph)
des is a very interesting algorithm in many respects (but in many other respects totally uninteresting)
des is er (well I have been told I'm sexier than Luka but that's taking it a little too far)
des is history (do they know something I don't?)
des is which? print message
des is de jungschar
des is the data encryption standard
des is ja der hammer" teil 5
des is a freiddes is not a group
des is permitted only for legacy systems
des is the destiny tours public relations man and often appears at car shows (heh)
des is deprecated"
des is weak due to a short key length (what did you say about my key length?)
des is des beste album (see. "Des is Des" is the best album)
des is slower than regular des (new! quicker acting des)
des is early intervention in the pattern of drug use by first
des is liebe koller
des is used at extremely low doses thus avoiding any toxicity issues that have been a problem for estrogen derivative medications (my personal favourite)
des is operating at recession levels of staffing during a period of tremendous economic prosperity and growth in the state
des is used (is that why I feel so dirty?)
des is dem koarl sei watschnaafoche homepeitsch neich gmocht
des is marching
des is well absorbed from the gastrointestinal tract (they don't know me as well as I thought)
des is de afkorting voor `diëthylstilbestrol`
des is vui nett von dia bzw
des is a symmetric algorithm that uses the same algorithm and key for encryption and decryption
des is the powerful and fully scalable machinery behind whitecross as an application service provider
des is die gardedes is a compound operation of des encryption and decryption
des is die sandra de is a sooooooooo lieb wie di simone
des is doch halber baumstamm was der in die brust hat
des is the keying systemdes is nur a provisorische seit’n

Other than all the weird German stuff and the staggering amount of doubt over my security I was pleasantly surprised.
I think that's me.

Hero of the Day: Cousin Dave for dealing with my transcripts for me. Thanks Dave.

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